Fiduciary Dom

 In any power exchange relationship, regardless of the terms used or level of exchange, it is more than the Dom giving orders, the power to give orders comes with the responsibility to properly manage the sub in a way that looks to the sub’s best interest. As a Dom the temptation, the great temptation, is to use the the sub for the Dom’s benefit. This is especially true if the sub is focused on the Dom to the detriment of the sub’s own interest. The sub pushing to be used is a further challenge to the Dom. 

A fiduciary duty is a long established (greatly financial) responsibility to look at the beneficiary’s interests, to manage in an ethical manner. It is easy to use the sub to the Dom’s advantage, to use his money, and his service. In a power exchange, this is acceptable so long as the sub is not taken advantage of. No matter how much the sub may beg for it, the Dom is responsible to look out for the sub, even if the sub thinks the Dom is going against him. 

What this benefit is may not be apparent on the surface. It may be long hours serving the Dom, sexually or not. It may be best for the sub to be loaned out to others. It may be chastity, or it may not. It could be monogamy. The important part is the improvement and growth of the sub. the sub may chaff and complain, but it is for his long term benefit. 

Let’s take an example of a power exchange relationship begun over a long distance. It progresses to the point where they want to cohabitate. The easy answer is to have the sub move to the Dom, get a new job. That is the easy answer. What if the sub has a decent job where they are now, but the best they could get is a fast-food one with the Dom. A Dom that insists on that for the Dom’s convenience is not acting as a good fiduciary to the sub. The Dom may need to move. They might need to delay until one or the other finds a suitable position and the move works for both of them - regardless of the direction. 

In an equal partnership, each would work with the other to come to a mutually beneficial decision. Jobs, homes, family, friends. All the factors that make up a life. When the sub cedes control, he also cedes duty. The Dom has to decide for both, taking on the part of the sub and fighting (albeit internally) on the sub’s behalf. 

In areas of small gradiency, it is fine for the Dom to act in his own benefit. Sure, all else being equal, the Dom’s house is 50 square feet smaller. So move to the Dom’s place. But if the relationship terminated tomorrow, the sub should not be worse off, or in an untenable position. 

The Dom must always be aware that the sub will offer up the sub’s discomfort to make it better for the Dom. This is something the Dom must discount and ignore. It’s not what the sub is expressing, even truly wanting that the Dom must consider, but the Dom’s ethical and fiduciary duty to the sub. 

The goal should be a neutral party looking at the decisions made and agreeing that the Dom acted well. The sub may be pushed, may have to struggle to obey. But it is improvement and growth.