Doms, subs, and forms of address

When a Dom and sub communicate, especially for the first time, it can be confusing as both bring in ideas of how to talk to each other. This can make things tricky. I think the best choice is accept what the other does until one says "I do or do not do X". In a Dom/sub interaction, the Dom usually sets things, but I think the sub does have some input. I'll admit these are my opinions, so will not work for everyone. 

I think the general rule is that a sub should address a Dom as "Sir". It shows respect from the start and is, in the US at least, is the standard for a male. I think this is how the Dom/sub dynamic works, subs should respect Doms. It's also how I was raised in the Southern US. I use "Sir" by default in vanilla interactions. It's part of my life. 

I usually refer to subs as "boy". It's my default. I may use other forms of address in some situations. If the sub does not like it, I expect him to tell me why, and offer an alternative. I will be flexible on this. If we are just talking I do not have jurisdiction to inform the sub what I will call him. 

If one or the other does not like how they are addressed, a polite notice to the other should suffice. If the two are getting to know each other, it will take some time to get this down if they want a change. The changes may cause more discussion. If the Dom wants to be called "Master", and the sub reserves that for the man he will pledge to forever, someone should move. In this case, I think it should be the Dom. "Master" has certain connetations, especially for subs. 

I don't get upset if a sub appraches me by name or without salutation. As confusing as how to address someone can be in the vanilla world, I give them latitude in the BDSM. Some subs think calling a Dom "Sir" indicates they are or want to submit to them. So I can easily see how they do not know what is right.  

The main point is both sides should be polite and understanding that there can be confusing. Establishing protocol always takes a bit of time. If the sub is respectful, and the Dom is understanding, a long conversation can happen, and there can be some great things as a result. 

After a conversation has been going on, the Dom and sub can establish other ways to address each other that works for them. Some standards are "Master" ,"Daddy", and "Boss" for Doms and "slut", "son", and "slave" for the sub. Naturally, it can be whatever they (usually the Dom) mutually decide.